Tuesday, June 14, 2011

Episode 20: Ties That Bind

This is a superbly boring intro scene. Something about some girls being locked up to be sold as slaves... an army of thugs... Ares manipulating a random baddie to try and take down Xena... Oh, hey! Ares is back again! With some more fabulous hair styling of course.

Xena and Gabby are watching the thugs from the branches of a tree, just waiting to strike. But before they can some old guy runs onto the field and starts beating up baddies left and right. Xena steps in and helps/rescues him from breaking a hip. Then he drops a bombshell. He's Xena's FATHER! Dun dun duuuuuuun.

He starts spazzing out about how much Xena has grown, and doesn't she recognize him? Xena's all, "Gimme a break," and walks off. Then she and Gabby break the ladies out of their cage. Gabby picks a lock all by herself! Go Gab Go!

Now, a bunch of plot happens with Ares and the main baddie and blah, blah, blah. What I REALLY want to point out is that Xena is sitting on a hill watching the girls they have just saved bathing in a lake. That is SO GAY.

Gabrielle walks up and tries to talk to Xena about the whole father thing. Basically, Xena thought her dad was the greatest thing in the whole world, until he left their family when she was little.

Speaking of the bad dad! Here he comes now! He tries to convince Xena, yet again, that he's her father by telling her the same story she just told Gabrielle. Hm.... I smell something fishy! Pun intended.

Gabrielle sees the supposed Xena daddy viciously kill some guy who was attempting to surrender. He claims it was in self defense, Gabby isn't looking so sure about that. She's on guard now you shifty old man!

He starts manipulating her into thinking that as long as she and Xena are together, he has to leave so as not to get in the way. Since Gabby just wants whats best for Xena, she starts thinking she should leave so her lady love can spend time with her dad. Nooooo! Don't fall for it, Gabby! But she does.

Xena starts fighting a bunch of people, I'm not really sure why... Regardless, she kills the main baddie and takes over his army of thugs, apparently to lead them to some sort of peaceful thing. Is it all coming together yet? It will soon.

Xena heads back to some village to catch up with her dear old dad and sees him beaten and tied up to a post. Supposedly the villagers did this to him because of some past crime. XENA GOES CRAZY!

She leads her army to attack the village! Dark Xena seems to be making a come back. The father guy dies. Uh oh. Pissed off Xena is not a healthy thing to have around.

Good thing Gabrielle came back to knock some sense into her. Literally.

Oh hey! Apparently the old guy/dad has come back from the dead! He's now trying to convince her to kill all the villagers for his revenge. Nooooow Xena is starting to get it. ARES! That manipulative bastard. He's been masquerading as Xena's daddy!

He tells her to join him or die. Yeah right! Ares will never kill Xena. He's OBSESSED with her, and she knows it. She uses that against him ALL the time.

All's well again! Thanks to Gabby, who is the real hero in this episode. Without her, Xena would have gone all blood thirsty again. Gabrielle is what keeps Xena heading on the right path.

Xena: "For me, our friendship binds us closer than blood ever could."
Gabby: "For me too."

*No fathers, spiritual or biological, were harmed during the production of this motion picture.*

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