Monday, June 6, 2011

Episode 8: Prometheus

There's a lot about this episode that is just annoying. There are some redeeming qualites. It's not that I don't like Hercules and Iolaus, it's just that they don't belong on Xena! I know, I know, Xena started out on Hercules. Heck! Even Renee O'Connor had her first role as a minor character on Hercules. BUT I DON'T CARE. They are annoying and need to leave.

Eek! Bad guys sneak up and cut Xena's head off! Yeah, right. It's a watermelon, you buffoon! Like Xena didn't hear you coming miles away. Gabrielle sleeps through the whole fight which is so adorable.

Later-ish we find out that no one's wounds can heal because Hera has chained up Prometheus. If you will recall from mythology, Prometheus gave us the gifts of fire and the ability for our bodies to heal themselves. Well! This sucks!

Xena has to get this special sword to cut through Prometheus' chains. Which she does. Then Hercules appears and they have a pissing contest to see who gets to be the one to free Prometheus. Apparently whoever holds the sword as the chains are cut will burn to a crisp.

Iolaus and Gabby have their own interaction where they moan about the trials of being best friends to super heroes. Okay, I have to say it. LOOK Hercules and Iolaus are totally gay for each other - Just like Xena and Gabrielle. These shows are GAY. Gay, gay, gay! Moving on.

Blah, blah, blah, lots and lots of boring plot later. Gabrielle tells one of my personal favorite stories ever about soul mates.

"Once a long, long time ago. All people had four legs and two heads. Then the gods threw down thunderbolts and split everyone in two. Each half then had two legs, and one head. But the separation left both sides with a desperate yearning to be reunited. Because they each shared the same soul. And ever since then, all people spend their lives searching for the other half of their soul."

It's a beautiful story, and best of all, non-gender specific.

So, Xena is fighting some weird blue creatures that pop out of big green eggs. WHAT? Whoever decided this was doing some crazy drugs. I'm lookin' at you Rob Tapert! Anyways, then a huge bird thing swoops down and carries her off. These special effects are SO BAD and SO GOOD all at the same time. I can't say it enough, I love this show!

Now, to the straight and ignorant viewer, it might seem like this episode is attempting to imply that Hercules and Xena are soul mates, and Gabby and Iolaus are soul mates. WRONG. Who leaves with who? That's right, Xena and Gabby ride off together, and Herc and Iolaus walk back to their own show. We essentially never see them again. It's all about the subtext ladies and gentlemen. Even the shows creators and writers have said that Xena and Gabrielle are soul mates. I'm not just making this shit up. It's FACT.

By the way, at the end of the credits, for the last seven episodes, it has simply said, "Filmed entirely on location in New Zealand." But NOW we get funny disclaimers! This is the first appearance of such ridiculousness. I'll start posting them at the end of each recap.

*Iolaus was harmed during the production of this motion picture. However, the Green Egg Men went on to live long and prosperous lives.*

4 comments:

  1. great recap. and to let you know aristophanes is the one who originated that soul mates story. it's a story i particularly enjoy

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  2. Well, "Aristophanes" according to Plato (in his Symposium). What, me nitpick? ;-)

    I remember once reading a funny fanfic, where Herc was married to Xena, and Iolaus to Gabrielle . . . but NEVERTHELESS, X&G were constantly arranging to be alone together to have sex like crazed weasels! [And duh-duh-duh, H&I were none the wiser] *LOL*

    Moving on...

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  3. I’m gonna start carrying a watermelon and a wig around too for in case someone tries to sneak up on me and kill me, was very impressed!
    Also that moment in the cave is maybe the gayest moment between Xena and Gabrielle in the series so far and I was here for it.

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